You're still probably working, at a nine to five pace.

Stressed up again all thanks to school..

NTR mid terms on Friday and Idk how well I'll do.

I mean, it is bio after all, and I kinda know a little bit about bio? But that's like three years back.

Idk how much I can remember.

I know I shouldn't be here and I ought to be studying, but I can't even concentrate Idk why. What's wrong with me? I didn't even use to be like this.

I guess I take all my words back - holidays ARE better than school.

I supposed I kinda forgot how busy and taxing school can be.. Assignments and tests and projects and exams piling up. It's like school barely started and I already have so many shit coming up.

And the price tag for my school fees doesn't even make me better. The price is insane, and the burden of the fees is really heavy. It's not cheap and I guess it just increases the stress. Can't afford to slip up, can't afford to screw up. Sigh.

I miss PJC, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but I miss RV too. When Mr Lim always told us we were being spoon-fed back in that school, no one really gave a damn to what he said because honestly, when you're 15, who cares about uni? But you know now that I'm here, I regret not listening. JC was kinda independent, but we still had subject reps to do shit for us - buy notes, print stuff, collect assignments. Uni just makes me feel like.. It's every man for himself. If you don't take the liberty to get hold of notes, that's just too bad, you're digging your own grave. If you don't buy your own textbooks, no one's gonna remind you to do so. If you don't hand in your homework, your lecturer's not gonna care, you'll just lose your marks. Every single assignment you turn in holds marks - it's not like in the past, where I could hand in a Math tutorial and leave half the questions blank. It's like everything you do, you've to be prepared to take up the consequences. No it's not a culture shock because I'm prepared for this, but it just never occurred to me that it'll be so hard.

And to all the atas people out there who're on your high white horses, you're not the only people who are having such a hard time so shut up about it. Just because we pay more school fees than you do, and we're studying in a private institution doesn't necessarily mean we get it easier than you do. Well if you have this mentality, screw you. Everyone's having it just as hard so stop coming to tell us that 'oh I'm so stressed I'm having mid-terms. Lucky for you, life seems pretty easy for you huh?' Stop being ignorant for goodness sake.

Oh gosh I side-tracked.

I know I shouldn't be sitting in front of my laptop typing this chunk of words but I guess I really need the therapeutic feeling blogging gives. At least I get to share my (bitchy) thoughts with people out there and I still get to vent my frustrations..

Okay I don't know what am I typing anymore.

I originally turned on my laptop to play L4D2 to relieve some stress by killing zombies (always used to work for me) but I got stressed 'cos I wasn't playing really well 'cos I had a lot on my mind. Besides I can't play games like that because I get headaches :/ How unfortunate.

I feel like I've no more time for myself and to do things that I want to do. Like today, I wanted to hit the gym but I decided not to after all 'cos I couldn't waste the 1h+ away. Sigh. It's like all the free time I have ought to be spent studying or on something school-related. You get what I mean? There's like nothing called free time anymore because all free time ought to be devoted to school. What rubbish is this.. Yeah sure I do have the weekends, and yeah sure Seowy and I do go out, and we do go shopping and stuff like that. But ever since I started school, we've been spending time at my place studying, something we never used to do. When we head to Sentosa for tanning, I lug my textbook there so I can get to study. It's like.. School's infiltrating every single aspect of my life. :/ Why is this happening? This never used to happen to me.. I love school, I really do. I just don't like the way it's taking over my life. ):

Someone pass me the vodka please.

Or maybe a credit card without a limit. Thanks!